Make sex FUN again!

Alright, I’m just going to say it: sex has gotten way too serious. Don’t get me wrong—I’m thrilled that we can openly talk about things like loss of libido, relationship stress, body image issues, and how Netflix is the new mood-killer (seriously, though, the “just one more episode” trap is real). It’s great that we’re addressing these things. But somewhere between all the discussions about what’s wrong with our sex lives, we’ve forgotten something pretty important: it’s supposed to be fun.

It’s like we’ve turned sex into a job—complete with deadlines, performance reviews, and a mountain of self-help books on how to “fix” it. Imagine playing a board game where instead of rolling the dice and enjoying the chaos, everyone’s stuck reading the instruction manual for hours, debating over the rules. That’s what’s happening with sex—too much thinking, not enough playing.

Why So Serious?

Here’s the thing: we live in a world of endless advice. Everywhere you look, someone’s offering tips on how to reclaim your sex drive, deal with emotional baggage, or achieve peak performance in bed (whatever that means). We’ve learned to view sex as something that needs to be fixed or optimized.

But you know what’s sexy? Ease. Lightness. Fun. Think back to when sex was less about strategy and more about spontaneity. Remember when you didn’t need a step-by-step guide to make it enjoyable? Maybe it was sneaky, quick, or involved some awkward fumbling—yet it was exciting because it didn’t come with the pressure of doing it right.

The truth is, when you turn sex into a problem to solve, it stops being fun. It becomes another thing to stress over, analyze, and critique. Yes, there are things that affect your libido and intimacy, but not everything needs to be a deep dive into your soul or your hormones. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is just enjoy the moment, without trying to figure out if it’s “enough.”

The Everyday Stuff That’s Killing Your Vibe

We’re all juggling a lot. Whether it’s work stress, parenting, or that sneaky burnout you’ve been ignoring for months, it’s easy to let these things suck the life out of your sex drive. You’re tired, you’ve got 40 tabs open in your brain, and you’re trying to remember if you replied to that email.

Sex? It can start to feel like one more thing on your to-do list. And yeah, sometimes life just happens, and the spark dims a little. But here’s a radical thought: instead of trying to force yourself to feel sexy despite all the chaos, how about finding little ways to inject some playfulness into your day-to-day life?

Think about it—sex doesn’t have to start in the bedroom. Maybe it’s sending a flirty text, sneaking in a kiss while dinner’s cooking, or dancing around the house like no one’s watching (or, you know, until someone does and then they join in). The goal isn’t to manufacture desire, but to make space for moments that feel light and fun. Because the truth is, when you feel less burdened, sex becomes a whole lot easier.

Sex and Laughter: The Ultimate Combo

You know what we don’t talk about enough? Laughter in bed. I’m serious. If your sex life is all intensity and no giggles, you’re missing out. Sex doesn’t always need to be this steamy, cinematic experience. Real life is full of awkward, clumsy, “did that just happen?” moments, and that’s what makes it great.

Here’s a little-known fact: laughter boosts oxytocin—the same hormone that bonds us to our partners and makes us feel all warm and connected. Plus, it lowers stress, which means better sex. So, if you’re caught in a cycle of thinking too hard about “getting in the mood,” maybe it’s time to lighten things up. Watch a silly movie together, tell a ridiculous joke, or embrace the weirdness of life and how it spills over into sex.

Tips to Bring the Fun Back to Bed

1. Stop Chasing Perfection: Sex isn’t a performance. Let go of the idea that it has to be mind-blowing every single time. Sometimes, it’s okay for it to be simple, or even just comforting. The goal is connection, not perfection.

2. Try Something New (Without the Pressure): Whether it’s a new position, a toy, or even just switching up the time of day you’re intimate, variety is the spice of life. But don’t turn it into a checklist. Explore for the sake of fun, not because you feel you have to.

3. Build the Anticipation: Send a flirty message during the day, give a compliment, or create little moments of connection that build up to the main event. The key here? No pressure. Just enjoy the back-and-forth.

4. Get Silly: If you feel awkward or disconnected, embrace it. Laugh at the awkwardness instead of trying to pretend it’s not happening. And who knows? Maybe that moment of shared laughter will lead to a deeper connection than any amount of mood lighting could.

5. Focus on Touch, Not Outcomes: Not every intimate moment has to be about sex. Sometimes, the best way to get back into the groove is through simple touch—cuddling, massaging, or even just holding hands. No pressure, no expectations. Just closeness.

6. Get Beducated: If you’re looking for fresh ideas or want to learn new techniques (without making it feel like homework), give Beducated a whirl. It’s like Netflix, but for your sex life—a streaming service filled with videos, workshops, and expert tips on everything from communication to positions you’ve never even heard of. Think of it as your ultimate cheat sheet for bringing the fun back into the bedroom. Plus, you can totally watch in your PJs.
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That Time I Overthought Sex…

Full confession: I once tried to stage the “perfect” night, and it went horribly wrong. I had everything planned—mood music, candles, sexy lingerie (that was honestly a little too itchy to be sexy). I was so wrapped up in whether everything was going according to plan that I couldn’t relax. My partner, sensing my overthinking, turned to me and said, “Do you just want to get pizza instead?” We ended up eating pizza in bed, laughing at how much pressure I’d put on what was supposed to be a fun night. And guess what? It turned out better than anything I’d planned. Turns out, the fun is in the imperfection.

Let’s Wrap This Up (But Not Too Tightly)

At the end of the day, we all want sex to be a source of connection, joy, and, yes, fun. Life throws a lot at us, and sure, that impacts our sex lives. But instead of treating sex like another thing to fix or master, let’s remember why we liked it in the first place.

The real magic happens when we stop overthinking, stop putting pressure on ourselves, and let things unfold naturally. Bring back the laughter, embrace the weird moments, and enjoy sex for what it is—imperfect, awkward, sometimes hilarious, and always human.

MAKE SEX FUN AGAIN!